e3

All posts tagged e3

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Game journalists seriously need to get laid.

Because it wouldn’t be game journalism unless people got ridiculously upset over stupid bullshit; The developers of Assassins Creed Unity are being called out over “no female characters” and that kind of bullshit. Ignoring that the game takes place during the French Revolution, I think this means we can expect to see a trend where history is rewritten to be more “politically correct.”

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The most lovable video game maker on the planet.

The most lovable video game designer on the planet.

After their digital event, and an extremely awkward series of technical issues, some time was spent showcasing how Splatoon is going to be FUN AS HELL and if you disagree you’re WRONG. I don’t care if it’s your opinion, it’s a wrong opinion and I won’t stand for it.

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Having watched the Microsoft conference and Sony conference in their entirety, I have come to the completely professional and unbiased opinion about the both of them and which one of the two gaming monoliths came out victorious. First is to mention how shocked I was that both consoles seemed to have games I wanted to play! It hasn’t been years since I thought, “Wow, I want to check out every system.” Aside from EA and Ubisoft’s horrible showings, this E3 was the least disappointing E3 in years. But yes, whom do I believe put on a better show?

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So far, Sony has been wiping the floor with everyone else. Microsoft put out a valiant effort this year, but was still lacking in games I’m actually interested in. Now it’s time to see what Sony pulls out… Last Guardian for PS4? Parappa 3? LET’S GET IT ON!

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You remember how Microsoft showcased Dance Central in about 2 minutes and didn’t do the dancers and everyone was absolutely enthralled by their restraint and desire for quality in their E3 presentation?

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Yeah.

Oh, Ubisoft is run by absolute numbskulls what did you expect? A horrible dancing showcase after a rather perplexing  yet intriguing Far Cry 4 trailer. I wonder what awful youtube personality Ubisoft will wheel out tonight. One of the clowns from Yogscast maybe.

A Video Game console (?)

A Video Game console (?)

After getting absolutely dominated at E3 2013, will Microsoft come out swinging with ACTUAL VIDEO GAMES? Or will they continue to revel
in the concentrated vomit of Kinect and all the things the Xbox One can do that aren’t video games (on the video game console.)
Though with the removal of Kinect and the price drop, the Xbox One’s potential is looking really sharp. This will be the ultimate test,
will Microsoft unleash a halestrom of amazing video games and prove that the company is populated with human beings who understand reason,
or will they focus on Kinect and showcase the Captalist Experimental Robots™ that run the company.

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By this point it’s a tradition; release a trailer for the game formerly known as Final Fantasy Versus XIII, then take an E3 or two off. That seems to once again be the case, despite the game being revitalized for current gen consoles. According to a Famitsu interview with Square Enix’s Shinji Hashimoto, neither Final Fantasy XV or Kingdom Hearts 3 will have a presence at this year’s E3.

You can read the relevant snippet from Hashimoto’s Famitsu interview after the break.

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